I Like It When You …….
A successful marriage requires doing some things for our spouses. One of them is the ability to listen when your spouse loved one tells you they like it when you do something for them. That something could be a collaborative act you do to support or help out..It could be things that you say…It could be your presence felt strongly in their life.
It can be silent, verbal physical but most importantly it’s something that your spouse really enjoys enough to put out there as a “I Like it when You” are doing something for them that improves their life. Someone else could do the same thing for them but what makes this unique is they like it when YOU, yes meaning you is involved, present and real.
So here’s a thought…Instead of reaching in the darkness to try and please our partners why not embrace the practice of doing something that your spouse actually tells you they like. Not profound but I know you can get some traction from this in your marriage.
So let’s get in the habit of communicating a few “I like it when’s” a week. If it’s something difficult for you to accommodate for your spouse let them know it’s difficult. Perhaps you can do something else meanwhile and keep your eye on finding a way to meet that need.
I like it when you say……..
I like it when we spend time…….
I like it when you touch me Hug me………
and I’ll let you both develop your own list.
It appears to me that a couple who involves themselves in the practice of informative communication will find some or many of their core marriage needs met resulting in a deeper more fulfilling connection with each other.
So try this focused communication exercise out and see where it goes.
I REALLY like it when your living in happier marriages! I REALLY do!
Zev
Check out the Podcast:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/recharge-your-marriage-show/id996275772?mt=2
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What Happened to the Relationship I Fell in Love With?
Remember the beginning of your relationship when you fell in love with this special person who showed you so much love and attention. Where did they go? You got married and at some point you realized that all that wonderful attention and love which by the way was the reason, perhaps the clincher of why you married in the first place has left the premises or just went poof and vanished.
Remember you had found that special person who just did it for you and you looked forward to a lifetime of special attention, loving affection and intimate companionship.
This scenario happens all too often in the scheme of marital outcomes. Your left to doubt whether what you thought you had is only true in the movies under categories like everlasting love and hot sex till death do you part.
There is something not fair about the best part of what you bought into about your marriage has disappeared. This is an important discussion you need to have with your mate. What can you say and how can you say it? Here is a start for you.
When you’re in a place with no distractions and your mindset is caring not angry and judgmental ….then you can take your spouse for a visit to how you felt back when you met like the special attention and affection oh also the lusty passion and just how much you miss that part of your relationship.
You can request some “together activities” where you might find some of that ole magic that drew the two of you together in the first place. I would like to see your request granted and I am routing for you!
I have lot’s more suggestions and if you follow this link you will find a clear path to reconnecting your marriage for much more fulfillment and a loving exchange.
http://rechargeyourmarriagenow.com/coaching/
Check out the Podcast
https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/recharge-your-marriage-show/id996275772
Warm Wishes,
Zev
Dare to be Formidable
If you’ve done what many do by marrying someone to be your savior, you should a least understand why if your now spending time feeling empty and disengaged. You searched for or found that special someone who will fill all the voids you’ve had and been carrying in your personal baggage. Finally someone to soothe all your baggage which is raging inside you.
If that’s the case and you are feeling disrespected, unappreciated or plain empty because you want to do something for yourself, the good news is you can. The not so good news is people have lots of trouble with change. When someone moves ahead personally some can absorb the impact many other souses are unprepared and unable to deal in a supportive collaborative way.
You can talk about it, plan for it or you may encounter sabotage and control because as you change you unearth insecurities, challenge perceived authority and some spousal partners get really scared and react in a most unfavorable way.
We/You have have a choice in how to go about increasing your share of life’s existential pie. If for instance you can be supportive and help your partner recognize you have some personal goals that you want to pursue, there is room in marriage for this. In fact, this can generate even more room for you to be able to challenge each other feeding positive trends maybe even sexual tension moving the two of you to a new plateau .
One where you both can Dare to be Formidable!
While it’s reasonable to expect our spouses to be supportive and not to making life so much harder than it can be already sometimes, we can’t expect them to fill all the empty spaces in our lives. We have to be our own saviors , relationships founded on expectations of being saved often run into conflict. Finding love and sustaining love means you must be committed to improving and developing yourself.
Find your platform step out and Dare to be a formidable person and get your marriage positioned to be a mutually formidable one as well.
ZEV Love your comments!
Check out the podcast The Recharge Your Marriage Show It’s sexy ….informative……provocative…something for every marriage.Here is the link:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/recharge-your-marriage-show/id996275772?mt=2
Marriage-Equal Opportunity Enterprise
Marriage is an equal opportunity phenomenon. The community of the married is widely diverse. Speaking with faith leaders of numerous denominations, spouses, the separated and divorced you hear the same patterns with an array of slants and spins about the marital enterprise. Whatever beliefs, religion, race, philosophy of life you adhere to or don’t, marriage has a way of challenging our collective abilities and it’s keeps on coming.
Marriage can be blissful and perplexing. Two people in close quarters trying to get it right as distractions abound. Instead of looking inward for support which has become uncomfortable, we find comfort outward. We are bombarded with a host of temptations. We look at other peoples marriages and sometimes wish we had “their kind of marriage”. Little do we know, that’s what ever is occurring behind the closed doors of the ideal couples marriage would make our marriage look like perfection on Earth.
So what can we do. We can recognize that marriage is an equal opportunity phenomenon. Whatever our life creeds might be, we can establish a marital climate which results in bigger doses of faith in each other. We can develop and sustain our own private rituals so our daily, weekly, monthly and yearly routines can have more flavor and a little dab of that magic human ingredient……. anticipation.
Believe in each other and that could be the start of a fresh new chapter.
Look forward to your comments as always.
Check out the Podcast! Here’s the link:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/recharge-your-marriage-show/id996275772?mt=2
People silhouettes. Vector illustration
Tantra Demystified Happiness/Intimacy Revealed
Check out my revealing interview with Intimacy Coach Laurie Handlers who reveals and demystifies Tantra and it’s major benefits to a more connected and fulfilling relationship………If yo feel blocked in any way from a life of Happiness and better Sex ..You should not miss this one ………Here is the link:
https://itunes.apple.com/…/recharge-your-marri…/id996275772…
Subscibe to the Podcast something revealing every time !